Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Hakuna Matata

First of all, thank you, Melissa for allowing me to contribute to this project.  My hope is that we reach many people and create an avenue for anyone with an interest in infertility to ask questions and seek answers.  If you are following, please help get the word out about the blog and share the link.

Sometimes you never know what your true passions are until you are forced into the culture of whatever it is you now find yourself passionate about.  I've been vocal about my feelings towards infertility and our story for a while now.  (Our meaning me and my hot, handsome, best friend of a husband of two years).  I find that so many more people care about us than I really knew of previously.  I mean, I knew we had friends and family that "care", but now I know who really cares.  I tell them, don't tiptoe around things that may be hard for us to hear, like someone else getting pregnant. I say, if you are confused about what to say to me, don't ask everyone else what you should say, ask me what would be helpful.  Now that we've been at this for some time, I have a lot of people thinking of us and asking how we are and what's going on.  Where am I at in a cycle? When have I peed on a stick? How long before old aunt flow arrives?  I realize not everybody is that comfortable talking about these personal things.  However, I'll tell you exactly why I am.  Because in December, after a year and a half of ttc (I have pcos), when we got our very first and only bfp and our very first miscarriage, I realized we were never alone.  At my godson's christening, when we didn't know still if our bfp would stick, I cried.  I held that sweet baby boy, my cousins on either side of me holding my hands, I cried, and then I smiled.  And at Christmas, when we showed up in our pajamas and just sobbed and sobbed, twenty plus arms of love were embracing us.  And we actually managed to enjoy Christmas.

It's been two years of ttc, including a total of 7 rounds of Clomid and two rounds of Femara.  I'm also on Metformin 1500mg.  We are about to start our last month of trying by way of old fashioned intercourse before we add IUI to our list of things tried.  It's about to get much more complicated, inconvenient, and costly.  When we get that next bfp, people will know right away.  We won't wait to tell because people are what got us through the last two years.

Passion.  There's that word again.  I know a lot about infertility. I'm also passionate about mental health.  I'm halfway to being licensed to practice therapy.   I read a lot, I ask a lot of questions, I learn as much as my brain can absorb.  I don't know everything, but I know a great deal.  And I'm passionate about paying it forward.  Blogging is a form of self preservation for me.  And Ask An Infertile is hopefully going to serve the same purpose for others.

Here's my blog:
And my Facebook page:


  1. I like the idea. Actually, there are many couples who despite of having infertility problems they shy to share it with others. Some are so shy about their condition that they even abstain from going to a doctor. I feel pity for those.

    Vijay Shree
    Surrogacy In Uttar Pradesh

  2. Thank you Vajay. We recognize that infertility can be a very private thing, so we hope that by talking about it and sharing our stories and what we have learned, we can encourage others to be more open about it.

  3. Things are solved when they are discussed with family. But some people are so conscious about their reputation that they never dare to go to doctor for infertility problems. Thank you Melissa for writing such a nice blog post.

    Best Wishes!
    Patria Jase


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